Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Offending delicate sensibilities in the workplace (Or, Pumping pink cum from the rubber penis in the office kitchen)

Our office has generic-looking soap dispensers in the restrooms and in the kitchen. Every once in a while, I've noticed that the woman who works here who cleans our area of the office gets lazy about refilling the soap dispenser. Rather than taking the empty soap thing out of the dispenser and replacing it with a new soap refill, she'll just plop the soap refill down next the sink for people to use.

And what an unfortunate-looking soap refill it is. It's basically a bag of pink soap, with a rubber tube jutting out of the bottom of it. When put in the dispenser, I think that the rubber tube fits up against the little lever that you press when you want it to dispense soap. The pink bag and the rubber tube are completely hidden from view when it's in the dispenser.

When it's just sitting out next to the sink though, not in the dispenser, there's no nondescript little lever or button to push to get soap to come out. Instead, you have to squeeze the rubber tube to get the soap to come out. It's kind of like having to squeeze a really tiny little penis that shoots pink stuff into your palm.

Seriously, every time I've ever seen that little refill sitting all by itself next to a sink, I've thought that it looks like a tiny little penis. And every time I've had to sqeeze that rubber tube to get the soap, I've had sexual (though gross) thoughts.

I've often wondered if other people in the office also can't help thinking unfortunate thoughts and feeling kind of dirty (how's that for irony) whenever they have to wash their hands and that's the only soap available. I've never heard anybody else make a comment about it. Out loud, anyway.

But today, when I went into the kitchen and saw another refill sitting on the edge of the sink, I saw that someone had made a comment about it. Actually, someone had left a comment on it. I don't know if they did this as a joke, recognizing what everybody probably thinks anyway and leaving a note to give people a laugh, (in which case, well done), or if they were seriously offended and did this to try to get the cleaning lady to stop just leaving refills by the sink instead of replacing them inside the actual dispensers (in which case, way to be tactful). Either way, I thought it was pretty funny. Funny enough to take a picture of with my cell phone.

Here's the picture:



The sticky note says, "This is disgusting!"

And I have to agree. Seriously, should I really have to pump a rubber penis until it spews pink gunk just to be able to wash my hands at work?

p.s. My boss just asked me if I was the one who left the note. Apparently it looks like something I'd do.

1 comment:

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Darek Wish