Loser Among Losers

I admit, I am watching the finale of The Bachelorette tonight. I'm all sucked into the big question of who is it gonna be, Jesse or Jason? Oooh, the suspense.

I also admit that sometimes I lose patience watching tv shows that last a long time (like tonight's finale), but still feel compelled to find out how it ends. Which puts me in a hurry-up-and-be-over mood, where I can't sit still watching the whole thing, but can't walk away without knowing the ending either.

Which brings me to the internet, to the wonderful world of googling. Sitting here in the now second hour of the two hour finale (that's going to be followed up by a one hour "tell-all" episode; holy fuck, ABC is OVERLOADING us with this show), I have lost interest in watching any more, but still I want to find out what's going to happen nevertheless. So I turned to the online search engine giant, asking it to tell me if there are any web sites out there that have spoilers on them about this show; surely it can't be a total secret, somebody out there in cyberland must have leaked the ending.

And that's how I came to the discussion boards on "Fans of Reality TV." Oh. My. God. I am amazed at how seriously invested a lot of tv-watchers out there are in this show. People are freeze-framing the show and analyzing body language and background scenes and stuff, trying to figure out what the stills of the previews they've recorded can tell them about what the ending is going to be. Intense discussions, in-depth analysis. And they are all geared up about tonight's final episode.

One person said in the comments that she is so excited about tonight's finale that she left work early today, and is planning to not go in until lunchtime tomorrow, and has not been able to sleep for two weeks worried about what the outcome is going to be.

And that's when I thought, "holy fuck man, how sad is it that people out there are that into this show that they're taking off time from work and not able to sleep at night for thinking about these reality tv participants' lives?"

And then THAT'S when I thought, "holy fuck man, how sad is it that I've been reading comments on a message board for the Bachelorette on the Fans of Reality TV website for 15 minutes now, as I sit here and simultaneously watch the finale, looking for a give-away to the ending of the show?"

You know, I don't think I really needed to complete that entire sentence above ... I think I could've stopped at "how sad is it that I've been reading comments on a message board ..." ok, maybe throw in the "for the Bachelorette" too, and that would've been plenty enough to show the level of loserdome to which I've sunk tonight.

I think it's important that I turn my tv off now. And maybe my computer too.